Transmutation of Anger Board
Anger and Mysticism
Part of the cleansing of karma that occurs along the spiritual path has to do with viewing anger in a different light. It is to be seen as an opportunity for insight and compassion. The Dalai Lama has said,
". . . even anger is not always destructive. For example, in some situations strong compassion may give rise to an equally strong sense of outrage—that is anger about an injustice. Again, feeling angry can, in the short term, make our minds more focused and give us an extra burst of energy and determination. In these ways, anger can, in certain situations, make us more effective in getting things done and in obtaining what we rightly seek. However, when anger extends beyond this practical function, most of the energy it brings us is not helpful at all. "
The goal here is to gain insight that leads to the creation of new avenues for interaction and response. Anger is an energy and you can use it to your advantage to avoid future drama and conflict. Start at the bottom and work your way up.
7. Balanced Synergy
A difficult situation has ultimately proven beneficial. You evolved to a new experience of internal synergy and peace on all levels. You needed to grow and the triggering situation was provided. You now know how to transmute a negative energy in yourself and perhaps in others into insight, wisdom, and positive possibilities. As you grow in consciousness from this and other situations, you can maintain balance and flow with the oneness of events.
6. Lead to Gold Transmutation
You see the next stage of personal growth and set new goals. You make the necessary internal adjustments and changes. You do not have to go through this situation again and again. Projects may be started which would not have been conceived of had it not been for this difficult situation. You have grown out of conflict and stress into wisdom and empowerment. You are a new person with new strengths. Believe in yourself and act accordingly. Initiate your plans. Your ability to change the future leads to problem solving in other areas. Remedial Activity #6 - Chart a new course of action while incorporating different response patterns.
5. The Ah-ha! Moment of Insight
You wait in the gap of silence until you have a breakthrough ah-ha! moment. Insight will arise from a bad situation. You understand something about your interactions with others and their interactions with you. You realize that you are in control of your life and can create something different in future. You take responsibility for your actions, response patterns, and protection. You consider alternatives and develop a corrective action plan for the future. Stopping here leads to all talk and the Inactivity Trap. Remedial Activity #5 - Synthesize what you know and understand into a response plan for the future.
4. Martyrdom Trap
You begin to see how this situation can be a learning experience either through discussions with the other party, or by turning inward with contemplation. The incident has triggered new awareness and you understand more about your own patterns of thinking and feeling than you did before. Anger, blame, and guilt subside, but stopping here leads to the Martyrdom Trap even if you forgive. Forgiveness can lighten your load, but you want to move upwards to insight and future corrective action. Remedial Activity #4 - Notice a connection that exists between everyone's insecurities, ineptitude, and woundedness.
3. Blame Self & the Guilt Trap
You realize how you might have contributed (consciously or unconsciously) to the present difficulty. Are you your own worst enemy? Do you criticize yourself with messages like: “How could I let this happen to me again?” Or, “the offender was probably upset over something I did, said, didn’t say or didn’t do.” Monday morning quarterbacking leads to plenty of “shoulda” messages. Stopping here leads to low self-esteem and the Guilt Trap as you begin to blame yourself for the encounter. Remedial Activity #3 - Journal those inner messages and insecurities that you think might have contributed to the offensive situation.
2. Blame Other & Hostility Trap
You blame the other person for the anger producing interchange. You defend yourself and show where you were right and s/he was wrong. You analyze his or her behavior and know exactly what is wrong with the other party. You might choose to confront the perpetrator. Doing so without carefully consideration can lead to escalation of the situation. Retaliating either openly or from behind the scenes also escalates conflicts. These tactics can fail and cause you further pain. Stopping here leads to the Hostility Trap. Remedial Activity #2 - Journal what it is that you thought the other person meant. What do you think was the real meaning or reason behind the action or words?
1. Take Offense & Avoidance Trap
Someone said or did something that offended or hurt you. You attach emotionally and become angry. You attempt to protect yourself from this person or situation by withdrawing temporarily or permanently. Permanent withdrawal leads to a loss of power over future interchanges with this person or this situation. If your anger stalls at this stage, you will fall into the Avoidance Trap, and soon, your avoidance expands to other individuals or similar situations. Avoidance can become a means for punishment by exclusion, but that limits both the punisher and the punished. Remedial Activity #1 - Journal exactly what happened, what was said and what was done. In particular note what it was that you found offensive. Take a deep breath and allow your emotions to settle.